Facilitative Coaching: A Toolkit for Expanding Your Repertoire and Achieving Lasting Results

Contents of the CD-ROM xv

Foreword by Roger Schwarz xxv

Introduction 1

Coaching Exercise Matrix: Matching Methods with Client Needs 9

PART ONE Foundations for Facilitative Coaching 13

ONE The Importance of Expanding Your Repertoire 15

Anne Marie Resolves Her Dilemma 16

How Our Approach Differs from Others 19

The Importance of Using a Full Range of Interventions 21

Results from Expanding Your Repertoire 25

TWO Guiding Principles 27

The Facilitative Coach Guiding Principles 28

Modeling the Guiding Principles 39

THREE Guidelines for Using Tools and Techniques 41

Tips for Diagnosing 41

How to Intervene 43

Intervention Steps 44

Choosing an Appropriate Intervention 46

Jointly Designing an Intervention 48

PART TWO Tools, Techniques, and Exercises 51

FOUR Starting with Yourself 53

Being Present 53

Exercises to Help You and Your Client Become Fully Present 55

4.1 Breathe Yourself Present 56

4.2 Sitting or Walking Meditation 58

4.3 Refocusing Attention 61

4.4 Where Are YOU? 62

Addressing Your Inner Critic 63

Inner Critic Exercise Series 70

4.5 Forming and Conversing with Your Inner Critic 71

4.6 Asking Your Inner Critic to Move Aside 73

4.7 Forming and Conversing with Your Compassionate Self 75

FIVE Changing Thinking 79

Distinguish Basic and Developmental Coaching 79

Developmental Coaching: James Sees It’s More Than a Meeting 80

Carefully Honor Joint Design, Curiosity, and Compassionate Support 82

Distinguish Coaching from Therapy 83

Exercises for Changing Thinking 84

5.1 Hot Buttons 85

5.2 Theory-in-Use Interventions 88

5.3 Left-Hand Column Cases 92

5.4 The Inside Story 103

5.5 Creative/Survival Cycle Exercise 108

SIX Talking It Through 119

Exploring Statements 120

Intervening on Ground Rules 121

Inquiring: Zesty Questions Change Lives 122

Using Stories to Connect the Dots 127

Verbal Meets Visual: Metaphors and Guided Imagery 129

Exercises for Talking It Through 134

6.1 Out of the Mouth, Into the Mind 135

6.2 Intervening on Ground Rules 137

6.3 Daily Ground Rules Practice 141

6.4 Opening the Door: Reflective Questions 143

6.5 Tell Me a Story 145

6.6 Role Play 148

6.7 Creating Metaphors 150

6.8 Guided Imagery 153

SEVEN Writing It Out 157

Structured and Reflective Writing 158

Guidelines for Writing Exercises 159

How It Works: Danna Discovers Her Muse 160

Structured Writing Exercises 162

7.1 Developing Decision Criteria 163

7.2 Clarifying Purpose and Goals 166

7.3 Stepping Stones to Project Completion 168

7.4 Make a List or Two 173

7.5 You and Me: Similarities and Differences in a Conflicted Relationship 175

Reflective Writing Exercises 177

7.6 Creating a Vision 178

7.7 Journaling: Guidance from Unconscious Wisdom 181

7.8 Assignments: Thematic Journaling 184

7.9 A Poem (or a Song) in Your Heart 186

7.10 Scripts: Making Imagined and Remembered Conversations Explicit 189

7.11 Letters Sent and Unsent 191

7.12 “This Is Your Life” Time Line 193

EIGHT Making It Visual 197

Sallie Sees Her Fragmentation 197

The Power of Visual Knowing 198

Intervening Through Visual Expression 202

Exercises for Visual Expression 209

8.1 This or That: Compare and Contrast 211

8.2 Cards of Choice 213

8.3 Shaping Your Reality 215

8.4 Knowing Your Gifts and Stuck Places 217

8.5 Mirror Drawing 220

8.6 Scribble Drawing 222

8.7 Vision Collage 224

8.8 Contrasting Experiences 226

8.9 Force Fit 229

8.10 Post Carding Problems 231

8.11 Inspirational Anchor Image 233

NINE Engaging the Body 235

Anne Discovers Body Wisdom 235

What Is Body Wisdom? 238

Benefits of Working Through the Body 239

Exercises for Accessing Body Wisdom 244

9.1 Three-Part Breath 245

9.2 Sitting or Lying Meditation with Circular Breath 248

9.3 Body Scan 251

9.4 Body Barometer 255

9.5 Centering 257

9.6 Balancing 259

9.7 Becoming the Mountain 261

9.8 Body Sculpting 264

TEN Conducting Fieldwork and Experiments 267

Defining Fieldwork and Experiments 267

Fieldwork: When and Why 268

Experiments: When and Why 269

Designing Fieldwork and Experiments 270

Conducting and Debriefing Fieldwork and Experiments 271

Exercises for Fieldwork 272

10.1 How to Jump-Start a Project 273

10.2 Surround Yourself: A Wall of Possibilities, A World of Options 275

10.3 Noticing and Tracking Your Behavior 278

10.4 Observing Others 281

10.5 Yes Versus No 284

10.6 Gifts Assessment: Interview Friends and Colleagues 286

Exercises for Experimentation 288

10.7 Do One Thing Differently 289

10.8 Practice Imperfection for a Change 291

10.9 Delegate a Task 293

10.10 Work Project Skills Transfer 295

ELEVEN Enacting Rituals 297

What Is a Ritual? 297

Elana’s Turning Point Ritual 298

The Parking Lot Ritual: Helping a Group Accept Change 299

Benefits of Including Rituals 301

Helping Your Client Design and Debrief a Ritual 302

Exercises for Rituals 303

11.1 Designing Daily Rituals 304

11.2 Solidify Intention 306

11.3 Transition Ritual 308

11.4 Breaking Free Ritual 311

TWELVE Assessing and Celebrating Results 315

Assessing Results 315

Celebrating Results 317

Exercises for Assessing and Celebrating Results 320

12.1. Questions for Assessing Results 321

12.2. Successes and Accomplishments List 324

12.3. Cards of Acknowledgment 327

12.4. Rewarding Yourself 329

12.5 Creating Awards 333

12.6 Celebration Dinners 335

PART THREE Putting It All Together 337

THIRTEEN Designing Your Own Interventions 339

Give Yourself Permission to Create 340

Shamelessly Mine the Gift of Life 340

Use Whatever Is Available in the Moment 341

Use Your Intuition 343

Start Where the Client Is 343

Build on Contrasts 344

Listen for Metaphors, Analogies, or Colorful Language 344

Adapt What You Know 345

Remain Curious and Playful 345

Co-Create with Clients and Colleagues 345

FOURTEEN Combining Modalities for Successful Coaching 347

Establishing a Relationship to Support Your Interventions 347

Combining Modalities 348

Guidelines for Choosing Modalities 350

Catalysts for Suggesting a Modality 352

A Three-Course Meal Plus Dessert: Combining Multiple 355

Modalities Over TimeClosing the Coaching Engagement 360

Putting It All Together: Practice Scenarios for Choosing and Combining Modalities 360

Appendices The Facilitative Coach Foundation Models 363

Appendix A: The Facilitative Coach Model 363

Appendix B: The Unilateral Control and Mutual Learning Models 377

Appendix C: Ground Rules for Effective Groups 381

Appendix D: The Diagnosis-Intervention Cycle 383

Appendix E: The Life Learning (Creative/Survival) Model™ 385

Appendix F: The Drama Triangle 389

Resources 393

Resources for Learning More 393

Suggested Art Materials 398

Suggestions for Addressing Chapter Fourteen Practice Scenarios 399

References 405

Index 409

About the Authors 421

About Roger Schwarz & Associates 427

About the Center for Creative Consciousness 429